Ms. Informed

Shania Twain and husband Mutt Lange are filing for divorce after 14 years of marriage. According to People Magazine, Lang left his wife for Marie-Anne Thiebaud, Shania’s secretary and house manager. Thiebaud denies she had anything to do with the breakup, however sources tell People that she, too, has left her husband to persue a relationship with Lange.

Twain, 42, and Lange, 59, have a 6-year-old son, Eja.

We all know Mariah Carey isn’t entirely on her rocker these day. And she is well-known for her outrageous requests and demands. But according to the UK’s Daily Mirror, Mimi actually pays a member of her 30-piece entourage to hold her drink and straw.

…That’s it. Hold her drink and straw. What’s the going rate for that line of work these days? She also employs another member of her possie to “keep her skirts from touching the floor. ”

Nice work if you can get it.

Must really suck to be David Archuleta today. Last night’s American Idol finale served up another superstar, and it might not have been who you thought it would be. David Cook, the 25-year-old bar tender from Missouri took home top honors of this competition and will be awarded with a record contract and an SUV.

Although Cook said it best after the show:

“This show is a springboard, but it’s still a crapshoot.”

(Cue Taylor Hicks, Rubben Studdard, Fantasia Barrino and a slew of other “Idol Stars” who never really amounted to much in the music industry after the finale’s credits rolled.)

Paula’s little speech before the announcement of the winner made absolutely no sense. (”Just remember sometime’s we think its all about winning, but sometimes its the things we lose that remind us how truely special we are as people”…uhh….ok Paula.)

And Simon’s apology — Was it an attempt to save some face after practically declaring Archuleta the winner the night before, or, did Simon intentionally “verge on disrespecting” Cook in order to bring in the pity vote for Cook, thereby confirming Cowell’s earlier predictions on the Ellen show? Oh AI politics. The world may never know.

Either way, Ms. Informed is pleased with the results. While Archuleta was the stereotypical teen pop Idol, Cook is clearly more talented and more deserving of his AI title.

Kristi Yamaguchi was crowned this season’s Dancing with the Stars winner last night on show’s season six finale. Yamaguchi, whos partner was Mark Ballas, is the first woman to take home the shiny mirrorball trophy since season one’s Kelly Monaco. DWTS’s seventh season will premiere this fall. Those World Figure Skater Championships must really pale in comparision to this honor.

A new idol will be crowned tonight as the Battle of the Davids reaches its final showdown. While the judges leaned toward teen sensation David Archuleta last night (with Simon calling him a knock out, and Randy practically naming him the 2008 winner), David Cook still stands a chance at winning the competition. Simon appeared on Ellen this week and predicted Cook would be the show’s winner. Tune in tonight for Fox’s 19-hour long season finale as they milk every second and don’t announce the winner til 9:59:59 P.M.

Jessica Alba and the hot guy who knocked her up tied the knot on Monday during a ceremony involving no guests and no witnesses. (If two celebrities get married in a forest and no one sees it…did they really get married?…) Alba and Cash Warren are expecting their first child this summer.

And as Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz got married this weekend, sources says the newly-Wentz’s confirmed at the wedding that they are expecting a Fall Out boy or girl of their own. (If it is a girl, maybe daddy can share all his great makeup tips with her. He wears more eyeliner than both Simpson girls combined.) Mrs. Wentz’s sister, Jessica Simpson, was escorted to the not-so-Pubic Affair at the Simpson family’s California home by Tony Romo. The pair reportedly called it quits a few weeks earlier, but Jess’s rep told People magazine that the break up rumors are “not true.”

He took the YouTube world by storm with his “Leave Britney Alone” video. Now the psychopath formerly known as Chris Crocker has paid homage to Danity Kane in this train-wreck of a video….just couldn’t bring myself to look away, hard as I tried….

I pray to God he now does it for the publicity and attention and not because he actually thinks he’s talented. Or attractive. Or both.

TMZ.com is reporting that despite rumors of an engagement, Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson have split. While there is no confirmation from either stars’ reps and several sources are saying there is no truth to this rumor, TMZ is usually on the ball with these things…we’ll see.

Other Simpson rumors circulating include a possible weekend wedding for Ashlee and Pete.

While his dad is busy hosting American Gladiators, a Florida judge who knows best sentenced Nick “Hogan” Bollella to 8 months in jail after pleading no contest to the charges of reckless driving involving serious bodily injury. He was also ordered to serve a probationary period of five years and 500 hours of community service. Bollella must surrender his driving privileges for three years and complete a DUI school within one year of his release from prison. His injured friend, former U.S. Marine John Graziano, 23, was not wearing a seatbelt at the time of the accident. He was left permanently brain-damaged after sustaining a broken skull may never fully recover.

Fair punishment for an accident, or a slap on the wrist because of who his father is (slash was)?

In related news, rapper Remy Ma was sentenced to 8 years in prison for a shooting that took place last summer outside of an NY nightclub. She claims it was an accident and plans to appeal the court’s decision.